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Terrdi, day 72 of Summer, 547 - Ethereal Mapping & Missing Sylvan

Today was very gratifying for me. I made a wonderful discovery during our regular PTF meeting that made all my ethereal studies worthwhile and that made me feel really good. I can identify the name of the sector of the ethereal plane in which I am, in addition to which sphere. This may not be much from other people's point of view, but to me it's really wonderful. This means that it will be much easier to map the spheres of the EP, and it means that I can contribute in a very tangible way.

The ether flow in Sapphire sector of the first sphere of the Ethereal Plane is peaceful.

It was very gratifying also because our goal today was exploring the dense ether passageways in the first sphere, and that is something that both Callia and I wanted to do for a long time. Over the last few seasons we too often lacked the strength to attempt this type of exploration, but today we were just strong enough to do it. In fact, we faced great opposition in EP but everyone worked very well together and it was one of the smoothest EP trip I have been on. I have updated my maps of EP to include what we discovered today.

The only negative thing about today's PTF meeting is the continued absence of Babajaga. She has not given any sign of life since more than a season ago now, and it's well beyond her given time of return from whatever trip she needed to make. I am very worried that something terrible has happened to her, as I don't see how she would be so long without sending us a word. I can't find her scroll in the library either, although that seems to be a problem with Red Quill itself. I do hope she is well and that she will be back among us soon. If anyone has news about her please send me a note.

Aside from that my studies have prevented me from doing too many things recently. I miss meeting my friends and I wish I could join more of the hunts of the clans I am considering. I was very happy to learn that Hepta was promoted to full mystic, and I can't wait to see her to congratulate her. I was also happy to learn that Amberdrake's memory was restored, although I am curious as to the fen who helped her get a cure.

One thing that I noted today during our return trip from EP is that there is only one sarir left in the alcove near Tenebrion's conference room. There used to be a number of them selling Swords of Souls, and something else that I can't remember at the moment, but only the one trading ethereal amulets is there now.

All in all I feel very good about what I am these days, as I find that I have many talents that cannot be measured in ranks or based on skills. It's been a long process but I think I finally feel that I have an intrinsic value that isn't dependant on other people's appreciation of me. Some people see me for what I am and some prefer to judge me by other people's actions. Some see me as a negative person because I sometimes express doubts, but others see me for the complex individual that I am and accept me with my quirks. The bottom line is that I now accept myself with my quirks and, although I regret that some people don't see me for what I am, I cannot, and will not, try to be something else for other people's sake.

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